Today Is the First Day of the Rest of Your Life…
Doesn’t that thought make you feel better, maybe relieved? Stop beating yourself up! Take a deep breath, forgive yourself for not living up to your own expectations, and then get REAL! Are you setting goals that are not realistic? Setting yourself up for failure? Did you proclaim New Year’s commitments that you never even attempted to attain or stopped trying after only a couple weeks? Well, you are not alone. Statistics show that only 65% of those who make New Year’s commitments stick to it for at least part of the year, while 35% never even start their new behavior! Here’s some ideas on how you can get started on your commitment…. again:
1. Get Real! – Make realistic goals for yourself. For example, if you are trying to lose weight and you have a HUGE sweet tooth, don’t expect that you will NEVER eat a dessert starting on January 1 until you have lost those 20 unwanted pounds. Give yourself a little break. Allow yourself one cookie a day if you’ve eaten healthy all day long. One cookie is not going to offset your diet. Make sure you eat it slowly, and savor it, really enjoy it. Don’t go for a second cookie though. Know that tomorrow you can have another.
2. Don’t expect perfection! Expecting to lessen the behavior that you wish to rid yourself of is usually more realistic than going cold turkey. Using the cookie example again, if once during the week you ate 3 cookies instead of the one, focus on the days that you were successful, not on the one day that you lost control. Celebrate your successes!
3. Share your commitments with others and ask close friends or family members to be your support person. Ask them to help get you back on track when you go astray. Give them ideas on how to approach you to help you so that you don’t become defensive when they point out your shortcoming.
4. You need to be motivated! Is your commitment something that you really want? If so, why? Is your desire to change the habit stronger than your desire to continue it? Give this some thought. You won’t be successful if you don’t have real motivation.
5. Set goals, but remember to be realistic! Don’t expect to lose 10 pounds in one week, it’s not going to happen, and it’s not healthy if you did. Create a plan with weekly goals, write it down, for example:
Preparing for 20 lb weight loss:
• Join Weight Watchers or another support group. These groups can help you set realistic goals for the amount of weight loss that you can expect each week. Setting smaller goals, such as an amount of weight loss each week, breaking down that 20 pounds into smaller increments, will take the overwhelm out of the goal and make the goal more achievable.
• Find low fat recipes online or in cookbooks.
• Write out menu plan for each day, breakfast, lunch and dinner and don’t forget snacks. Allow modifications based on food preference for that day.
• Buy ingredients for recipes for at least the first week.
• Select a form of exercise that you will enjoy doing.
• Write out a weekly exercise plan where you increase the length of time exercising and repetitions as the weeks go on. If you haven’t been exercising, start out slow, consult your physician.
• Purchase exercise clothes or equipment if necessary.
• Write in a journal every day to help release emotions and hopefully avoid emotional eating.
(I’m sure there is more that can be added to this list, but it is a starting example of how planning ahead can help you become successful with your goal.)
6. Incorporate spirituality into your commitment! Using the weight loss example again, be mindful of the triggers that bring about your cravings. Know that a craving is temporary, it will dissolve, but what we do between the onset of the craving and our response is very important. A great quote by author and Holocaust survivor Victor Frankl says it all:
“Between stimulus and response, there’s a space, and in that space is our power to choose our response, and in our response lies our growth and freedom”.
How can you become more mindful? Meditate. If you don’t know how, buy a CD that will walk you through a meditation process. Another way is to simply sit quietly and observe your thoughts and breathing without judgement when a craving starts. Notice what thoughts you are having that might be triggering this craving. Realize you have a choice.
7. If you find that you are struggling with creating a plan for whatever it is you desire to achieve, consider working with a coach. A coach can be the missing piece you need for getting on track and staying on track. Call me, Ray Giumentaro, “America’s Accountability Coach”™ at 508-353-0098, to set up a FREE half hour coaching consultation. I would love to show you how I can help you achieve your dreams! Happy YEAR!
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